Coffee Detox

 

 I began drinking coffee every morning after having Hudson my third child. The act of drinking the vanilla or sometimes hazelnut flavored goodness gave me peace and solace in the morning. I think what I found most appealing was that this moment gave me a few minutes of time to gather my thoughts for the day. It was during this morning session that I would read my Bible, pray and gather my mind for what the day would be fashioned to look like and then decide how I wanted to portray myself to my kids and to others. My kids knew that mommy was not available until I finished my mug of coffee. I love every part of the process of taking coffee in. I loved watching the coffee brew, the aroma that filled the home, I loved watching my creamer float into the coffee mixing like paints on a canvas. That first sip feeling was pretty great and then the “go get em” spirit once the caffeine kicked in was also very necessary to keep up with my munchkins. However, last Monday morning while in the shower I painstakingly decided to give up coffee. I am a disciplined person so once I made this decision it was pretty much said and done, no turning back. I have toyed with the  idea of letting go of coffee for about a year for reasons such as better health, more calm, restoration of my thyroid, the ability to be able to relax and various other reasons but I did not have the courage to stop brewing the cup. This particular Monday morning I found myself at a cross roads. I had been wrestling with fears that I touched on in My Slip on the Slopes article (you can read my fears here)  and I wanted to release those fears. While in the shower, it finally hit me that maybe I should start by letting go of something small in my life before I tackle my big fears and that something small happened to be letting go of my daily coffee cup or to be honest coffee cups. If you are finding yourself on a similar journey and want to let go of the daily cup I will let you know what I experienced and maybe it will help you not be so afraid to say goodbye to the daily cup and hello, instead, to trying something new and to proving to yourself that you are a great person even without the mocha or mochachino as my kids so lovingly call it. 

Day 1

I was crazy sluggish and on the evening of day one I literally dreamt about coffee all night long. In my dream I was in a long line and a bunch of scenarios kept blocking my way from receiving my coffee. I was then awakened by my alarm. Phew! What a nightmare! I knew I could not give in to the addiction in my reality and I could not even give in to the addiction in my dreams. Geesh!

Day 2

I was tired again on this day and it looked as though in my line of vision I had fog in my eyes...literal fog. I was a walking zombie. I went out to breakfast with Michael and then grocery shopped. I felt like I could fall asleep while pushing my cart. I had a massive headache and I probably should not have been allowed to drive on this day. I did, however, notice that I had less bloat and I felt a calmness within me that I had not felt in years. After picking my kids up from school we started our routine where we ate snacks, played outside and then started homework. While Ryleigh read her school books to me I fell asleep on the couch. I do not take naps. I have not taken a nap in years. Without the coffee in my system I felt something I had not felt in awhile and it was such a calm that I just fell asleep on the couch while my seven year old read to me. All of a sudden I was being awakened because she said, “Mom! What are you doing?” I did not want her precious spirit to be crushed that I had fallen asleep while she was showing me her skills so I just said, “Mommy, was closing her eyes.” Ooops. Seriously this is a new leaf for me because I had not taken a real nap for years or really even had the urge to nap at all. This evening I slept deep and had the best dreams, none of which included standing in line for coffee. I believe the calm I felt on this day transcended into the evening and allowed me to sleep without waking.

Day 3

I again was feeling less bloated but I did not have a headache. I felt energized and ready to go. Also, I noticed that I had been drinking more water which is pretty necessary for living and also is an energy giver. 

Days 4-9

I have been able to be myself, the self I knew before coffee. I have felt when I had the naturally awake feeling and when I am naturally tired feeling, whereas, when I had the caffeine buzz I could not always sense these things. When I consistently had coffee I could feel tiredness but would not be able to nap and sometimes at night I did not have sound sleep. Some evenings I would wake in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. I have found a renewed love for taking naps that I lost back in 2016 when I first picked coffee up. 

In a nutshell, for me this has been a multiple days journey, but has not been too bad, in fact, for the most part I feel great. I thought I would feel terrible for weeks. Now, do I still want a cup of coffee every now and then, sure. If I have a friend who invites me out for coffee I will still go and have coffee or a chai tea latte, there are options. However, to allow myself to rely on the need for coffee every day in order to function is now a thing of the past. I have given up my need for coffee in order to be able to function. So, if you are looking to give up coffee or maybe you want to give up something like sugar, alcohol, social media or watching the bachelor then this post is for you because I want for us to know as individuals and collectively that we can do it. If we make up our minds to stick to being disciplined we have it within ourselves to complete what we have set out to do. I believe that we have the power within to accomplish hard things. Let’s not be like those who sign up for the race and then don’t show up on race day. Let’s finish the race with our whole selves. Even if we cross the finish line walking or stumbling in we will be able to say we did it. Congratulations because you are a finisher of the race!